Throwing Marshmallows

Yesterday the Diane Rehm Show (on NPR) did a segment on homeschooling. It featured Mike Donnelly (from HSLDA), Rob Reich (associate professor of ethics at Stanford) and Gretchen Roe (homeschool mom and part-time liaison for Calvert School).

I have lots of comments about the show which, in my opinion, came across as fairly positive to homeschooling. I do not want to get into all the points that I would have liked to have seen made, but I did want to focus on one aspect that Rob Reich brought up…the issue of the rights of children.

At one point, Reich posed a question to Donnelly (who had just said that HSLDA was for more freedom for parents, wanting parents to have more choices and less government intrusion): “Are you also for the freedom of the children? What if the child wants to learn, say science, but the parents haven’t taught them that?”

This argument for additional oversight of homeschoolers is one that I have seen made other times as well, mostly by my fellow progressives and mostly in response to the perceived “brainwashing” of children by Christian homeschool parents. And to be honest with you, on face value, this can seem to be a compelling argument, especially for those with stereotypical views of homeschoolers and homeschooling. The idea that children can be sheltered and only hear “one point of view” (one with which many progressives would have issues with) bothers many people.

But when you start looking closer at the argument about protecting “the rights of the children”, you realize that it is not as clear cut an argument as it would seem. And this is because it implies that children have rights over what/when/how they learn outside of homeschooling and that it is homeschooling itself that deprives children of these rights.

But this most definitely is not the case. Switch his argument around a little bit and ask: “What if a child does not learn best with the curriculum the school has chosen? Does he have the right in school to get a different curriculum that better fits his learning style?” Ummm….no. He barely has the right to get accommodations and the parents usually have to fight tooth and nail to get those.

“What if a child is a right-brained learner who is not truly ready to read until between 8 or 9 years old?” Does that child have the right to wait and not be forced into learning to read before he is ready? No. He gets labeled as “late” and slapped with a learning disability (because of course it has to be the child that is broken, not the school).

To be honest with you, one of the main reasons that I am homeschooling is because I believe that children should be allowed to learn on their own timeframe and in a manner that works for them. I am homeschooling precisely because I do feel that my children have rights and that homeschooling is the best way to ensure those rights.

Reich’s argument seems to be less about whether children should have rights and more about who gets to make the decision about what the child learns. The state or the parent. I prefer to let the parents, who have a much more vested interest in the child, make this call. Does that mean that parents always make the right call for what is best for their children? Nope. But please don’t tell me that the state gets it right every time either.

I find it interesting that people who call for more oversight of homeschoolers often seem to have more of a problem with what is being taught rather than with the actual idea of homeschooling. These are the people who call for more oversight and want, as Reich has advocated for, some kind of “curricular oversight” to ensure “that parents are exposing their children to ideas, beliefs and values that go beyond what the children would encounter naturally in the home”.

Now, I am most certainly not arguing against exposure to alternative points of view! It is something that I consciously try to do. What I am arguing against however is the state enforcing how this is done. And here is why:

In order for me to have the freedom to teach my child what I feel is important (such as the different world religions) that means that others have to have the freedom to teach their children what they feel is important (even if I do not agree with it). It is the old free speech argument…I may not agree with what you have to say, but I will defend your right to say it.

Again, suppose the tables were switched…suppose fundamentalist Christians got to decide what was taught in public schools and only creationism was allowed. Would liberals feel that they should have the right to take their children out and teach them evolution at home? Would they feel that the Christians in charge of the schools had a right to dictate what they could/could not teach at home? If not, then they should not feel that they have the right to dictate what Christian homeschoolers teach at home.

It is a hard issue to grapple with, because we all want children to have the best environment in which to learn and grow. And we all have different ideas of what this “best environment” looks like. What it comes down to for me is that we live in a free society and one of the aspects of living in a free society is that people are going to make choices for themselves and their children with which not everyone agrees.

I have more to say on this subject, but I think that this has been getting a bit long. I will save the rest for tomorrow…

I know, not very original and there definitely has been lots of talk about the California court homeschooling ruling. But since there is so much information floating around, I kind of felt like I needed to pull some of it together in one place, at least for my own sake. It has been amazing the amount of speculation going on about what this means, both for homeschooling in California and for homeschooling nationwide.

One thing you will see is that I am not going to link to any news coverage. Most reporters really do not understand homeschooling in general and there are so many subtleties to this case that media just can’t seem to get it right and has been full of dire predictions and misinterpretations.

VaHomeschoolers has put out a statement for Virginia homeschoolers who might be worried about the larger implications of this case. It is very unlikely that this will affect us here because, unlike California, we have a specific home instruction statute and in order for us to loose our rights, the General Assembly would have to pass legislation to remove that language from the Code of Virginia and the Governor would have to sign it. VaHomeschoolers closely monitors legislation every year to ensure that this does not happen.

I have found that the best place for information has been the California state homeschool organizations. They are the ones most familiar with the state laws and the political climate (not to mention the ones with the most vested interest in the outcome!) and will be posting frequent updates as things go on.

• Homeschool Association of California
• California Homeschool Net

There was an informative podcast interview with Debbie Schwarzer,HSC Legal Team Co-chair. She talks a little about what they know about the case, what they are doing and reassures folks that right now what they need most is for everyone to sit tight and let them work on it.

National Home Education Legal Defense (NHELD) has issued a Bulletin about the ruling in which they talk a lot about the legal issues involved. I found this to be a good overview of the legal intricacies.

As far as the petition being circulated by HSLDA, HSC has said the following:

Dear List Members

We have seen a post forwarding a letter from HSLDA that addresses the recent court ruling regarding homeschooling in California. Their letter offers a link to a petition, saying that you can help stop this threat to homeschooling by signing the petition. While we believe there is no harm in signing the petition, we do not feel it is necessary.

We believe that it is important to remain calm and allow the Legal Teams of the various homeschooling organizations to address the issues appropriately through legal channels. We certainly understand that you will want to stay informed and be involved in any ways that can help in resolving threats to homeschooling freedoms, and we will be keeping you closely posted as things arise that can be impacted with your help.

So while we do not discourage you from signing the petition, we also see no benefit in signing it either.

We encourage you to read our position recently posted on our website at http://hsc.org/Appellatedecision

Thank you so much for all your patience and support.

Sincerely,
HSC Board of Directors
HSC Legal Team

I find this good to know as I have many issues with HSLDA’s political stances on issues outside of homeschooling and prefer not to give them my personal information (although I would have if it would have helped). It does look as if HSC and CHN are taking donations for their legal funds so that is another more direct and effective way of helping.

One lesson that I think can be taken from the situation in California is that it is is vitally important to support your statewide homeschool organization, if your state has one. California is lucky to have several active groups who already had networks and relationships in place so they were able to mobilize quickly.

Virginia is lucky as well to have two statewide organizations and it is for this reason that I donate both my time and money to VaHomeschoolers. VaHomeschoolers has been working for over 10 years to promote homeschooling, developing good working relationships with both the Virginia Department of Education as well as state lawmakers. VaHomeschoolers believes that all homeschoolers’ interests are served when government, news media, and the public see us as a diverse people united in our love of our children and in our valuing freedom to teach and learn at home.

Education is the key to keeping our homeschool freedoms.

Shannon from PhatMommy will be a guest on BlogTalkRadio this Tuesday night (December 5th)  to discuss homeschooling. The show description is as follows:

School Your Children Well: We’re talking about tot yoga, college-prep preschool, homeschooling v public school… Featuring Alex Elliot, PhatMommy and Pundit Mom.

The program starts at 10 pm ET, but Shannon’s segment will begin around 10:30. (Prior to that they will be discussing preschool.) Her “opposition” is Joanne from PunditMom .

If you are available between 10:30 and 11pm ET, feel free to call in and support Shannon by posing thoughtful questions to PunditMom. You can listen to the broadcast here.

Should be an interesting discussion…good luck Shannon!

~Stephanie

Another artcle came out about the VaHomeschoolers Conference. This one was in the Midlothian Exchange (in Chesterfield County, outside of Richmond), Taking Charge of Education.

I was really impressed that she got the law stuff right! So often newspaper accounts either don’t really explain it well, or get it wrong (how many times did I have to read that the new law that went into effect in July “allowed parents with only a high school diploma to homeschool”. It did nothing of the sort…folks with a high school diploma have always been able to homeschool…the new law just reduced the paperwork required…but I digress) It looks like Elizabeth did her homework (we did not talk much about the law specifics although she did sit in on my Beginning Homeschool session) which is nice to see.

I was surprised to see myself quoted so much! Yikes! How weird. Actually it was more of paraphrased…as I remember talking about these things with her, but not saying exactly these things. I guess that it must be hard to get an exact quote when you are just talking and taking notes. I do think that she did a good job of catching the essance of what I was saying, so I can’t complain!

Overall, I am really impressed with how many good points she was able to include…it was more in depth then I expected and did present homeschoolers as a diverse group. She also interviewed a Chesterfield family at the Conference and had some good quotes including this one:

The couple looked into private schools as an option, but the decision to homeschool the boys became an easier decision after talking with other parents. “It was an easy jump. There is a more diverse group to homeschoolers now. It’s a new movement with more options,” she said.

Whew. I get really nervous talking with “the press” and always wonder how it will turn out. This one turned out pretty dang good!

~Stephanie

Tags:virginia homeschool homeschool conference

My friend and fellow Life Without School author Tammy has created a new blog called Just Enough and Nothing More to capture her homeschool writings and thoughts. She has a great post up right now called Public School is Not a Smorgasborg:

One of the arguments against alternative forms of education - whether it be homeschooling, private schools, Montessori, or any other - attempts to point out that these alternatives offer a limited view of the world. The arguments claim that by not “allowing” children to go to a traditional school, parents are limiting their experiences.

I haven’t gotten a chance to read all the posts she has up there, but I am looking forward to getting comfy with a cup of tea and reading my heart out.

~Steph

There were some emails going around my groups about an NPR intern who was doing a story on unschooling and looking for unschoolers to talk with. I figure what the hey, I might as well give him a call!

Turns out that he had already gotten enough people to use for the radio interview (which was good, I wasn’t sure I really wanted to be recorded!) but he was looking to talk to a wide variety of unschoolers to help him get a feel for what it was about. So basically we just talked about homeschooling/unschooling for a little less then an hour or so. And the boys only interrupted me once, miracle of miracles!

He started out by asking me what the boys (after I had told him that I had two boys and their ages) were doing right now (it was about 12:30). Jason was playing his video game and Kyle had just helped me make a sandwich and was eating it. We talked a bit about how I came to homeschooling and then unschooling. He asked me some questions about HSLDA (and I think that I was very tactful, merely pointing out that what most homeschoolers don’t like about them is that they mix conservative political and religious causes with homeschooling issues and they tend to say that they represent “homeschoolers” when I can tell you they most definitely do not represent me!

He said that he found it interesting that most of the people that he talked with considered themselves progressives and wanted to know my impression of fundamentalist Christians’ attitude about unschooling. I told him that it was impossible to make blanket statements and that two of my very good unschooling friends were fundamentalist Christians. I did say that in my experience, the Christians who unschooled tended to the more open-minded side of the spectrum and that my friends felt very strongly that unschooling went hand-in-hand with their spiritual beliefs. 

We talked a bit about Jason not learning to read until around 8 and how that did not hold him back. About the idea that kids develop on their own schedule and when they are ready they do it. And how hard it can be when that schedule is later then our culture says it should be. Even got to work in my “kids need two things to learn…they need to be ready and they need access to information in a way that makes sense to them” idea.

He was kind of funny…he asked if he could play devil’s advocate for a minute and ask me some harder hitting questions. He then asked me the “S” (socialization) question (hah! you call that hard hitting??) and the “how do you respond to people who say that schools need parents like you and that you are abandoning the kids in school”. Had no problem answering those. (Probably should answer them on my blog one of these days!)

One thing I did have some trouble with was how did I define unschooling (like I could not have seen that one coming!) After the interview was over, I thought about it for a little while and realized that I have been gradually coming to my own definition of unschooling. Unschooling is not about the “what” you are doing, but rather about the “why”. And the “why” needs to be driven by what your kids need…not from your own fears…not from what our culture says…not from what the “experts” say. It is about trusting in your kids and letting them develop on the timetable that is right for them. Ok, so it still needs a little work…

He asked if he could come out and meet with us (thinking that we were in Northern Va). I think it would have been fun, but when he found out that we were in Ocean City he thought that might be a bit too far to go. Kind of bummed, it would have been fun, I think.

All in all we had a very nice conversation. I asked him how he came to be interested in unschooling. He had a friend in college who had been unschooled and had not started reading until 12 and he found it really interesting. So when he was looking for topics, he decided he would like to learn more about it.

The unschooling program is being done for his internship program and will be “fully produced” and available on their website. There is a chance that it will be aired if an affiliate decides to pick it up. Like I said, I will not be on the actual program, but at least I was a part of it. And it was fun! Now I just have to cross my fingers that unschooling will be portrayed in a positive light! I think that it will, given our conversation. He said that he would email me with a link when it was available. I will let you know!

~Steph

I originally posted this on Life Without School but wanted to save it here as well. I hope that you don’t mind reading it again if you have already seen it!

The Isolated Homeschooler

One of the more common arguments against homeschooling is that it “isolates” kids. That somehow kids, if not in school, will never be exposed to the world at large. That homeschoolers sit at home all day with no interaction with anyone outside their family.

I have found quite the opposite has been true for us.  School can become a crutch – you don’t need to look beyond it because all your kids’ social or academic opportunities are provided for.  But I do not want to be limited by what the school can provide. Homeschooling, for me, has led to a greater involvement in my community precisely because I do not have the school to depend on to meet the needs of my kids. I can not just sit back and let the school provide everything; I need to stay active and engaged in my kids’ lives.

Because we are not in school we have more time to explore our community. I am constantly looking for new activities through our county recreation centers, local YMCA and other neighborhood centers. I search out new parks to explore. I network with other homeschoolers to find interesting activities. I have been amazed at the variety of opportunities that come across my local homeschooling email lists – special events at museums, storytelling evenings at a local community center, music shows, fascinating websites – all things that I would not have been looking for had my kids been in school.

Homeschoolers are also extremely good at creating what they need – be it foreign language classes, park days, co-ops, or yu-gi-oh clubs. We live by the motto “Build it and they will come”. And they do! Local businesses and organizations are happy to offer classes during their typically slow times during “school hours”. Many people are very willing to share their expertise if just asked. And it is amazing what a group of motivated homeschool moms can accomplish together. I sometimes wish that there were not as many great opportunities as it is very easy to get overscheduled! Socialization is not a concern here by any measure.

The homeschooling community is a very welcoming one. When a new homeschooler moves into a new state or city, all they need to do is find the local homeschool email list or support group to get advice about the new laws or places to live. They can also get hooked into the local activities before moving. When we were going to spend the entire summer in Ocean City, Maryland this past year, I joined a few email lists and made connections with some local homeschoolers. The boys made some very good friends and we had a wonderful summer and are looking forward to going back this year. These summer connections led to our finding out about a Maryland homeschool camp this spring where we had an incredible time. The group we camped with has exciting activities that we are now hoping to take advantage of such as star gazing evenings (they are far enough out that light pollution is not the issue it is where we are).  We have now broadened our community from not only Virginia, but to several parts of Maryland as well.  And best yet, these connections are based on common interests and friendship rather then on our zip code and school zone.

Homeschooling has also led me to be more active politically. I am a member of my inclusive, statewide homeschool organization that helps monitor homeschooling legislation. As I have learned more about how the process works, I have been empowered to take a more active role in other political causes about which I feel strongly.

Are all homeschoolers as active and involved in their community? No. Some live in areas that do not have as many opportunities or some choose to not be involved. But attendance in school does not guarantee community involvement either. Some families are able to remain isolated even when their kids are in school. There is no guarantee. Are there parents of school kids who actively look for interesting opportunities outside of school? Yes, of course. But after four years of homeschooling, I honestly believe that I am much more connected to my community and the world at large then I would have been had my kids been in school. I have had to be and I would not have it any other way.

~Steph

Yesterday while we were at Jason’s OT, I over heard another mom talking with an intern about her son starting kindergarten next year. They were talking about how she would need to work to get the school to make some accomodations for her son…he has high functioning autism. I did not say anything, but I was trying to figure out if there was a way that I could tactfully butt in and mention homeschooling….just throw it out there as a suggestion at least. But there was not, so I kept my mouth shut.

Interestingly enough, I heard the intern having another conversation with another parent and they mentioned homeschooling. So when the intern came back over my way, I asked her about it. Turns out that she had homeschooled for high school. While we were talking, the first mom happened to overhear us talking and joined in. Turns out that she was open to the idea of homeschooling and started asking me a lot of questions. The biggest thing she was curious about was support and having other kids for her son to play with. I was able to explain about all the homeschooling opportunities that we had around here and explain a bit about the law. I gave her the VaHomeschoolers website and the VaEclecticHS email list information and my phone number and told her she could call me if she had any more questions.

Then today we went to a fun nature center presentation with the Arlington Homeschool Families group. Afterwards we stayed in the park and had a picnic and the kids ran around and played frisbee. While we were sitting there, a guy came up and explained that he was making a documentary for the park showing all the different things that people can do while there. He was hoping to be able to film the kids and us to use. After he finished, he asked if he could ask us some questions about homeschooling. Turns out he is not even married yet, but he has always been interested in homeschooling. We all had a really nice conversation about it and he seemed to really understand it and be interested.

I have to admit that I have no desire to “convert” everyone to homeschooling. But I do want people to be aware that it is an option. So if school is not working for their child and they are fighting the school to get what their child needs, they at least have heard about homeschooling and realize that it is doable. I think that too often people think that if it is so hard just to get their kids to do homework and study for school, then actually doing the whole school thing has got to be even harder! But in reality it is like comparing apples and oranges. Once you get your child home, you have so much more control over what you do…if they are struggling with something you can slow down and help them or even put it aside for later. You do not need to make sure they “keep up”, you do not need to get them to change because of how the school teaches. You can change how you teach because of how your child learns. And that in itself is huge.

So I am happy to talk to folks about homeschooling and whether or not they decide to do it really is not the point. The fact that they know a little bit more about it expands their options. Which means that they realize that going to school is a choice. And when you have choice you have freedom to do what works for your family. Which is what life is all about.

~Steph

Natalie over on Homeschool Cafe has a great post on Silencing Homeschool Critics Without Statistics. She makes the point that you do not need facts and figures and “proof”, sometimes all you need to do is ask a question or two back to help them look at things from a different point of view.

I have started pointing out to people when they ask questions like “aren’t you concerned about socialization” or “aren’t you worried about them getting into college” that of course I am concerned about these things. Of course I want my kids to grow up and be functioning adults. And after much reading and research I choose to homeschool. So maybe, just maybe, it is possible to homeschool and raise functional adults. Ya think?

I really do think that most people (at least the ones that I come across) are well-meaning and genuinely interested or curious. It is just something with which they are not familiar. Homeschooling does require a bit of a paridigm shift…you have to think outside the box and question commonly held and accepted beliefs. See how socialization can occur without school. See how learning can happen without grades or tests (at least for us). One warning though…homeschooling can lead to the questioning of many these beliefs…but that is half the fun!

I actually enjoy the looks of surprise when people find out that I homeschool. I do not fit many people’s image of a typical homeschooler. I am a democrat, I am a Unitarian Universalist, and for the most part I am a fairly normal person. Really, I am! So it surprises people to find out that I homeschool. The interesting thing is that the homeschool community actually is very diverse…people from all faiths, all political points of view. There are about as many reasons to homeschool as there are homeschoolers. You would be surprised.

But I like the idea that I can help someone expand their understanding of homeschooling and I am always willing to talk about it. Jeff has asked me many times why I always wind up talking about homeschooling…I think the reason is that most people ask me about my kids..and then the next normal question is what grade are they in and do they enjoy school. Which leads to homeschooling…so it really is not my fault! But it is fun…

~Steph

My friend Barb and her family were highlighted in this tv news piece on unschooling. Be sure to click on “Leaving Normal School Behind” to see the news clip.

Barb and her boys did a wonderful job at representing homeschoolers. I love some of her quotes even if the reporter did misrepresent a few things (he said that her kids will not receive a diploma and would have to take the GED or take an online course to get a certificate of completion…while it is true that her kids will not receive a diploma from the state of Virginia, she can issue her own diploma. And yes, homeschooled kids without a state issued diploma can and do get into colleges but that is the subject for a different post).

It was fun to see Barb’s boys…what I want to know is where the piles of books and papers and the overflowing bookcases were…at least that is how my house looks!

Update: Barb has posted more information about the interview on her blog. I find it really interesting that even with a story on unschooling they had to have their obligatory “mom teaching kids at the kitchen table” shot. Too funny.

~Steph

This past September, someone wrote a letter to the editor in a Fredricksburg newspaper.

While I definitely get and appreciate the sentiment of this, this was not a message on an email list between homeschoolers, this was a public letter to the editor by someone who is not even hsing yet (and not even very original as I have seen many versions of the same idea throughout my 3 years of homeschooling). I have to wonder, did he really think that this would reflect positively on homeschoolers? I think that homeschooling has enough to offer on its own merits that we do not need to go publicly bashing the school system. This did nothing to promote acceptance or understanding of hsing. In fact, it made us look very close-minded and judgmental. I was not alone in my perceptions as can be seen by the 2 responses that it generated:

Why slam our public schools?
Homeschool if you like, it is your loss

These letters illustrate how much homeschooling is misunderstood, an impression that the original letter did nothing to help. It bothered me so much, that I actually ended up writing my first letter to the editor. Kind of exciting to see it in print (although I was annoyed that they put hyphens in all my references to homeschooling!)