Throwing Marshmallows

Well we have been down here for about a week now and I think that we are settling in quite nicely. Most things are unpacked. We have hit the beach 3 times and the waterpark once. I still need to hang pictures and shelves back on the walls but will probably wait until Jeff gets down here this weekend.

We had a lot of nice little things done during the off-season…we now have ceiling fans that work in the main two living areas downstairs. Amazing the difference that having a little bit of air movement can make. We replaced the single lighting fixture over the island with a nicer two fixture light that ties in better with the kitchen. Had recessed lighting installed in the main living area so we can now dim the overhead lights and had additional outside lighting installed.

We also had the closets and the pantry redone. Which I have to say is the nicest thing! The old closets basically just had a bar and that was it. Lots of wasted space. I put mostly shelves in the downstairs closets as we use the guest bedroom closet as an overflow pantry. The kitchen pantry is so much better! The old shelves were warped and badly painted. I also replaced the bi-fold dooor with two doors that swing out so now you can see everything in the pantry and the door does not block the back hallway the way it used to. It feels so good to have a place for most of everything now.

One thing that is really nice about being down here is that we really have less “stuff” and there are no major “house projects” hanging over us. No garage or basement to clean out, not as many piles of clutter to decide what to do with. I need to remember this when we go home so I can be inspired to get rid of more of the junk there! I also love how we really have no commitments down here, yet we stay very busy. No classes, no doctor’s appointments, no reason to have to get up and out of the house other then getting to the beach. Not to mention that things on the whole are just more relaxed around here…things just operate on a different “beach” time. Which is fine as long as you are not waiting for a dinner reservation on a weekend! Which is why we tend to try to go out during the week and stay home on the weekends! Being able to walk to many places is nice too.

We are having to rethink some things…such as how to keep Ellie out of the cat’s box. At home, the box is in the unfinished basement and Ellie is too scared of the wooden stairs to go down. Here it is in the small downstairs bedroom and Ellie has decided that it is fun to bring cat poop into the other rooms! Jeff should be bringing down a baby gate to put in the doorway so hopefully that will solve things.

One thing I was worried about was leaving Ellie during the day (we obviously are out and about more down here on a daily basis) but that has been working out really well. No accidents and she has been fine being out in the house (at home she would scratch at the doors…here the door is mostly glass, but I have noticed that she is not scratching as much).

The boys are funny…they want to do everything all at once. They have already had two sleepovers with Jack (one here a couple of nights ago and one at Jack’s last night) and are begging for more. They want to go to Layton’s for breakfast every morning and Fish Tales for dinner nearly every night (not gonna happen) and want ice cream and lemonades every day at the beach. Think that we might just do a Layton’s breakfast once a week (kind of like how we have pizza night) and will have to think about giving the kids a “treat allowance” so they do not bug me all the time. Still need to get their annual henna tattoos…maybe this weekend when it is supposed to be cooler and possibly rain.

Well, gotta head off to the waterpark!

~Stephanie

OK, so I am about a week or so late on getting this link up. But it is not like I haven’t had lots going on, so I will use that as my excuse.

Check out the latest offering of the Country Fair Homeschool Carnival. Back after a bit of an absence, it looks better then ever. The theme was diversity…

~Stephanie

Just realized that I have not given an Ellie update in awhile. Overall I have to say that we are heads over heels in love with this little pup.  She is such a cutie and has added a lot to our family. I have to say that I am really glad that Kyle is such an animal lover and kept on us about getting a dog. While I still consider myself and overall cat person, I have very much been taken with our little cutie.

Ellie turned 1 back in May. She is more or less housebroken (as long as I don’t put her off when I know that she needs to go). I will say that it has been interesting going back to that place of being focused on peeing and pooping again. Haven’t worried this much about those things since Kyle potty trained! Ellie loves small fleece toys (we found some cute crabs and lobsters for here at the beach) and air kongs (toys made out a tennis ball material in different shapes…bones, sticks, balls etc) and her soft frisbee.

She has a certain way about her…she does not just walk, she prances. And when she runs, she bounds. She is beautiful to watch and I am so thankful that we have a large backyard (we are actually having to adjust to having a smaller yard here at the beach). She can run to her little hearts content and I have gotten dizzy watching her zoom in circles. She loves to chase the boys and they get such a kick out of chasing her and throwing her toys for her.

Interestingly enough, the thing that I dreaded most is the thing that I have been enjoying the most…having to take her outside and walk her. I did not think that I would enjoy having to take her out…however I have found that I actually look forward to it. She makes me have to get outside in the morning, during the day and in the evening which has come as a wonderful gift. I am finding that it is very peaceful, especially early in the morning and late in the evening. And I am finding that I like taking these breaks and that it is good for me. I notice more of what is going on in my backyard and neighborhood (the new birds nest or the changing of the moon each night). The boys and I go out together in the afternoon which is a lot of fun as well. It also gives them a chance to burn off some energy. Now, there are some days when it is not so fun and I have to admit that there were times (snowy and rainly times!) back in March that I was not quite so thrilled, but now since it has been nicer, it really is a wonderful thing.

Wow. This has gotten long pretty quickly. I may need to continue this tomorrow. There is lots more to tell…

~Stephanie

Well, we made it. I am sure that I have forgotten lots of stuff (and have already started my list for Jeff).

It is so nice to be down here again. The weather was beautiful. I relaxed just driving over the bridge. Still getting unpacked and trying to put the place back together again (we had the main room painted and had some other work done so everything has been moved around).

The trip itself was fun. Hit the Dunkin Donuts drive-through on the way so that the boys can get their double chocolate donuts and I can get my caramel latte. We are listening to Physik (the third in the Septimus Heap series) and really enjoying it. I will have to post a review soon.

All the animals survived (Ellie (the dog), Lapis and Sammie (the cats) and the 4 guinea pigs). Makes for interesting travel though. The cats really do not like the car, so they are in their carriers meowing off and on again. Luckily Ellie is a great traveler. She hung out between the boys just happy that she is going with us and not being left behind.

The last hour or so she decided that Kyle’s lap would be more comfortable. Kyle loved it and they looked so cute.

It actually looks like it will be cool this weekend, so we will have to play it by ear. One of the things that I love about summer is that we have no real schedule. Other then go the beach. I know, life is rough. It is homeschool day at the Jolly Roger Waterpark on Monday so we will probably hit that. And the boys can’t wait to get together with Jack.

Gotta go unpack some more. Or actually I really should head to bed…so I think that I will take Ellie out real quick and then hit the hay. I have to say that I enjoy our late night outings now that it is summer…much nicer now that it is warm. And especially down here overlooking the water.

Have I mentioned that I love summer?

~Stephanie

The Organization of Virginia Homeschoolers

2007 Conference and Resource Fair

www.VaHomeschoolers.org/2007conference/

Science Museum of Virginia

Richmond, Virginia

July 20 – 21, 2007

Family Programming sets the VaHomeschoolers Conference Apart!

The VaHomeschoolers Conference and Resource Fair is not designed around families but for families. We begin by choosing a location that has built-in family fun and learning - the Science Museum of Virginia.

Then we add exciting activities and sessions to entertain kids of all ages. This year’s program includes Passport to Adventure, an interactive “tour” of countries around the world “visited” through displays, crafts and games.

In addition, families can experience the cultures of other countries through both musical and dance programs, as well as a professional puppet show by Barefoot Puppet Theatre.

Register now! www.vahomeschoolers.org/2007conference/registration.asp

Friday Evening – The Fun Begins!

“Tropical Treats” Talent Show, Art Exhibit and Ice Cream Social

Friday, July 20th 7 p.m.– 10 p.m.

Holiday Inn Crossroads – Host Hotel

2000 Staples Mill Road

Grab your passport, your grass skirt and come to the tropics where we will enjoy the talents of the Virginia Homeschooling Community. Along with the entertainment, you can enjoy the ice cream sundae bar, which includes dairy and non dairy choices as well as gluten free toppings.

Come relax with your homeschool friends from across the Commonwealth, including the Board and Conference Committee from The Organization of Virginia Homeschoolers. If your kids or your family has a talent to share, be sure to sign up for the talent or art portion of the evening. To participate, you must register with the party coordinator, Kelly McCants by emailing party@vahomeschoolers.org.

There is no fee for this party, but tax deductible donations are welcome and an RSVP is required.

www.vahomeschoolers.org/2007conference/tropical_treats.asp

Saturday - Prepare to Tour the World!

Family Programming Schedule: www.vahomeschoolers.org/2007conference/family_programming.asp

Passport to Adventure

Ongoing from 9 a.m. to 4:00 p.m.

Grab your passport at the VaHomeschoolers Booth and visit Japan, India, Ghana and many other countries as you travel around the world through games and crafts.

Throughout the museum, various countries will be represented at different stations. Each country (station) will share information on the culture of that country with a game and/or craft. After completing the activity in a “country”, your tour guide will stamp your passport and you can move on to visit another country. Upon traveling completely around the world (visiting all stations), return to the VaHomeschoolers passport office to receive an acknowledgement

of your world travel and to be entered for a grand prize drawing. All entries for the drawing must be in by 4:30 pm and the winner will be posted at the Passport Office at 4:45 pm.

Sessions, Sessions, and more Sessions

Check out the family programming sessions we have lined up for you!

International Dance Performance and Workshop - Session 2 10:20 – 11:20 am

Tour the world of dance! Professional dancers Will Sterling Walker and Lawanda Raines, will be joined by homeschooling dancers Marisol, Antonio and Nicolas Betancourt-Sotolongo and Lauren Mort in performing dances from India, Africa, Spain, France, Brazil, the Caribbean and the United States. Audience members will be invited to participate and learn various steps throughout this world tour.

Trickster Tales – Puppet Show – Session 3 12:40 – 1:40 pm

This session does require pre-registration

Anansi the spider is up to his old tricks again in this show that brings to life two traditional West African stories: Tug-of-War and A Story, A Story. Colorful scenery, original music and lots of puns create a wonderful backdrop for the antics of these expressive rod and hand puppets. It’s a high-energy show with fun for all ages!

Following the performance, audience members will have an opportunity to see the puppets in action, ask questions of the puppeteers, learn how the Rugg family combines touring and homeschooling and hear a bit about using puppetry in your homeschooling.

Stomp, Clap or Tap World Rhythms! – Session 4 2:00 – 3:00 pm

Take an interactive journey, exploring African, Caribbean and Latin rhythms and instruments. Learn, see and hear the difference between bongos and congas, and many other hand drums as well as the traditional rhythms performed with them. Everyone gets to be a part of the fun in this show where participants will stomp, clap or play various instruments throughout this presentation.

Snickerdoodle Storytime – Session 5 3:45 – 4:15 pm

Fun in a nutshell! Former kindergarten teacher and award-winning Virginia author, Clare Grosgebauer will share her “Snickerdoodle” stories (for kids 3-7) about a tiny superhero who thinks big and uses humor and imagination to solve giant-size problems. Kids can also hear the “Snickerdoodle Rap” on the CD and create their own rhythms. Free stickers for kids and lesson plans for parents.

All Day fun in the Science Museum of Virginia

Every registration includes free admission to the museum where you can see rats play basketball, “walk” on the moon, or form crystals.

In addition to all the permanent exhibits at the museum, visit the traveling exhibition, Savage Ancient Seas which features more than 50 prehistoric marine skeletons, including actual specimens and casts mounted on the floor and suspended from the ceiling.

Peer into the mouth of the largest aquatic reptile known to man – a 45-foot-long Bunker Tylosaurus. Walk under the Lock Ness Monster’s ancient ancestor – a 42-foot long plesiosaur. Check out Archelon – a 17-foot-wide sea turtle. Hang out with a school of vicious carnivorous fish called Pachyrhizodus.

With the purchase of a separate ticket, you can see the Dinosaurs Alive! Or the newest Harry Potter at the awe-inspiring IMAX experience in the Ethyl Corporation IMAX DOME & Planetarium, the biggest movie screen in Virginia.

Please note the latest in the Harry Potter series, “The Order of the Phoenix” will be playing at SMV ’s IMAX theater on the conference weekend. These and all IMAX showings require an additional ticket purchase. The Group Rate is available for conference registrants — be sure to request it, if you pre-order your tickets. Tickets for “Harry Potter” will go on sale June 15. For more information, visit www.smv.org.

www.vahomeschoolers.org/2007conference/smvfree.asp

The Organization of Virginia Homeschoolers
www.VaHomeschoolers.org
Your Resource. Your Voice. Your Association.

Not June played around with my header image and reformatted it a bit so that it crops better. It looks so much better…thanks so much. My friends take such good care of me…

And check out Not June’s reflections about folks who say they could “never homeschool”. I agree with her about not writing them off as lost causes. I wrote a post awhile back on Life Without School called “I Don’t Know How You Do It” that talks a little bit about how I deal with this question (that does come up frequently).

My take is that it is not that these folks are incapable of grasping homeschooling. It is just that they do not understand what homeschooling is because they really have no experience with it. They think “school at home”. They think that if they struggle to get their kids just to do their homework then to actually have to teach them would be even worse.

But that is not what homeschooling is about. And there are folks who can and do eventually see that. Not June was one. I usually just say that it is not as hard as you think. That I don’t sit and “teach” the kids for six hours a day. I don’t do “school at home”. That what I do at home is much more relaxed and natural then what they do at school. That there are so many things I can do at home that make learning so much easier. Things like:

• Being able to follow my kids interests.
• Being able to go at my child’s pace.
• Being able to stop and change if something is not working.
• Understanding and teaching to my child’s learning style.
• Being able to teach on their schedule (for us that means 10-15 mins here and there).
• Not separating learning from living.

I could go on and on. I also point out how some things are easier…I don’t have to make them do homework or tests because we do the work together and I know what they know and don’t know. I also do not have to keep him up (or hold him back) because of some arbitrary standard. If he gets it, we move on. If he needs more time we take it. I don’t have to worry about where the class is or if he is going to be left behind or bored. Or that the teacher is not teaching in a way that works for him.

I remember talking to a neighbor a couple of summers ago. Her son (who was just a bit older then Kyle) was actually a grade ahead of him in school (he had a late birthday and they did not hold him back). The small private school felt that he needed some extra help over the summer with reading and math…since he was a bit “behind” the other kids and the next year was going to be even more challenging. So they gave her work for her to do with him over the summer. Needless to say, he was not overly motivated and did not want to do a lot of the work. Battles between them ensued. While we were talking she swore she had no idea how I did this year round. The thing is, that what she was doing and what I do are two totally different things. She was trying to make her son be at a certain level that the school needed him to be at regardless of whether he was ready to be there (and over the summer no less!) My personal feeling is that he just needed more time and would get there eventually…but she did not have that luxury. Because he would be “behind”. And they needed him to be able to “keep up”.

Because I teach my boys at home, I can give them that time. Because we can change the focus as needed. If they need time in one area, we can focus on another. Learning does not stop because they get stuck. We can keep moving and come back as needed. Our learning is based on what the boys need as individuals. Not on what the Virginia Standards of Learning (SOLs) or Fairfax County say. This makes all the difference in the world.

Often when I bring up these points, people start to nod their head. Sometimes, they look disbelievingly at me. But it usually makes them think. And I have to think that some of them might, like Not June, get it. (and I have actually known some folks who do)

Yes, there are many people who, for various reasons, could never homeschool. But I really think that we need to give people more credit rather then just writing them off as incapable. I know that the first time I heard about homeschooling, I did not think it was the path for me. That changed as I learned and read more about it. Knowledge and information are wonderful things.

~Stephanie

Well, those of you who are not reading this blog via email or a blog reader have probably already noticed that I have changed my blog theme. I was feeling the need for a change and decided to check this one out when Andrea posted about a new 3 column theme.

The picture in the header is one of my own…a picture off the back dock of our place in Ocean City (where we are headed in only 3 days!) I am not really thrilled about the way it was cropped (I would have liked to keep a little bit more of the chairs) but I think that it works. Here is the entire uncropped picture (yes, I am very lucky and can’t wait to get down there).

I took this picture back in January right after I had gotten my new camera. We were just getting ready to go home after spending New Years at the beach when I noticed the awesome light. It was cool, but not cold. Very crisp and clear. I took several pictures, experimenting with how to compose the picture. I like how this one turned out. I feel more relaxed just by looking at it.

I think that I am going to like this theme…It makes it easy to change the picture if I get bored…I can also play around with the colors as well. I do wish that it had a place for a tagline so I could have the Throwing Marshmallows quote a bit more prominent. But this seems to have a clean look to it (although the font seems a bit small). Let me know what you think.

I have been playing around with the sidebars a bit and realized that I really need to find time to update my blogroll. I did find a nice VT Ribbon that I like and Silvia had a link to a great countdown widget. So I now have a countdown going until the VaHomeschoolers Conference! (Which is also the same day as the release of the new Harry Potter book…) Ack! I can’t believe that it is this close.

I am also noticing that this theme does some weird things with the placement of my photos…all photos are right justified and the captions don’t line up with the pictures any more. I will have to look into that…

I hope to have time to post some pictures from the homeschool camp we just got back from…we had a blast but Jason and I seem to have picked up a cold which has been kicking my butt. So I have been trying to be good about getting enough sleep (obviously not tonight though!)

Better run and get some rest. Busy day tomorrow (today?) and only 3 more days until we head for the beach!

~Stephanie

PS If there are any spelling typos in this, I will blame it on Andrea since the spell check is still not working…(sorry Andrea…couldn’t resist giving you a hard time…like you don’t have tons of other stuff on your plate right now!)

Never try to host a crab fest for your husband’s entire company while you are planning a statewide homeschool conference at the same time you are getting ready to leave for a 4 day homeschool camp after which you will be getting ready to leave for 3 months at the beach. Did you get that?

Now granted, we did not need to plan the actual crab fest itself, just provide the venue. The great folks at his company handled all the technical details…like the crabs, the Red Hot and Blue BBQ, the huge tent, the moon bounce, the ice cream machines, the margarita machine. But this still meant that I had to try to have the house in somewhat decent shape. Which is harder then it sounds. Or maybe it sounds harder then I think…

So now tomorrow I just have to pack for 4 days at the Rhubarb Jam Homeschool camp in the Catoctin Mountains (just down the road from Camp David). I am really looking forward to the camp, but have so much left to do! We get to hang out with the Wilkinsons in addition to several families from Northern Virginia as well. This is the second year we are doing this camp and the boys have been looking forward to it all year.

And when we get back, we will be heading down to Ocean City until September! Basically as soon as we can get ourselves packed up we can go. But that means that in addition to the the boxes in the garage of stuff for the crab fest and the boxes in the garage for our stuff to go to camp there are also boxes in the garage for our stuff to go to the beach. Needless to say my car has not been in the garage for some time now…

Oh, and did I mention the VaHomeschoolers Conference and Resource Fair? Before I leave I have to get an email announcement and a press release out. They should go out tomorrow (in between the laundry and the shopping). If any of you folks in Virginia want to help get the word out, please feel free to print out a flyer and hang it any where you think that homeschoolers might see it…the library, recreation center, grocery store or even Starbucks! We have found that word of mouth is our best PR and we need your help! We are a bit behind at getting the word out (one of the challenges with a volunteer organization!)

The good thing is that I am still standing. Which is nothing short of a miracle. Believe me. I think that I am going to crash and burn when we get to camp! I am actually looking forward to 4 days without my computer (which will explain while it is going to be very quiet here over the next week!)

Two more days and we are off….

~Stephanie

OK, so not a very original title, but it does the job.

Tammy over at Just Enough and Nothing More had an interesting post titled Homeschooling is Anti-Feminist? In it, she responds to this post. Tammy has many good points with which I agree.

In the post, Amanda (after expressing her concerns about parents being allowed to teach creation science and then reassuring folks that she knows that liberals homeschool too) talks about her biggest concern about homeschooling:

Still, I’m suspicious of the use of homeschooling to subvert the system for the same reason Chris is suspicious of a certain strain of the politics of personal purity—why is it that the solutions to all these problems come back to asking women to provide more and more unpaid labor?

Amanda makes several interesting assumptions. One, that homeschoolers (at least liberal ones who do not homeschool for religious reasons) in general homeschool mostly because of problems with the schools and that given a choice, they would prefer to be in the work force. While this is the case for some, it is not the case for all. And two, that paid labor is the main measure of a person’s “worth”.

The elephant in the middle of the room during discussions about homeschooling is the fact that in order to make it work most of the time, women will have to abandon the hope of having paid employment for a couple of decades. It’s taking the “opt-out revolution” and extending women’s obligations to work for free for the family beyond the early years when kids are too small for school and sticking women at home throughout her kids’ adolescence.

Again this makes it sound as if homeschooling is being foisted on us and that we are being forced into doing something that we really do not want to do. I honestly do not hold out hope of having paid employment even after my kids are out of the house.

I am college educated (BS in Management Science from Virginia Tech). I worked as a professional for 8 years (the last 2 years being part time after Jason was born) at a large information technology consulting company where I was a systems consultant. I did a variety of things including systems requirements and design and client training and support. I enjoyed my work while I did it. But I have no desire to go back to it and I do not miss it. I also do not need it to define who I am. Because I am so much more then what I get paid for.

If I ever go back to paid work, I am not sure what I would do, but it would be something where I could keep more a balance between my personal life and professional life (yes, even without kids, I would not want a job to take over my life).

What I hope to do is to get more involved in volunteer work and figure out how I can make a difference in this world. Or find something that I am really passionate about. Passion would definitely be a priority.

And being a homeschooler is a lot more work than being a housewife; you have to provide the education that a whole passel of people at the high school provide, on top of your domestic duties, and you don’t get that paycheck at the end of it nor do you get the summer break.

This buys into the belief that homeschooling recreates “school at home” and is best done by experts (hence all homeschool parents must become experts). I won’t get into this too much here (but should remember to write a post on this topic soon!). I will say that I have found that it is very possible to teach my kids without having to be a “qualified teacher” for many reasons. I happen to love learning, am very curious and I have been willing to put some time into researching methods/learning styles. Rather then find this “work” I am thoroughly enjoying myself. I honestly love learning with my kids.

For all the hand-wringing concern in this article for the social lives of teenagers, the omission of even an ounce of concern for the right of a mother to have a life outside of child-rearing is suspiciously absent. The importance of having a variety of experiences and social occasions doesn’t end when people turn 18; hard as it may be for the mainstream media to remember, mothers are people, too, and as such, they benefit from having opportunities to get out of the house and to take breaks from non-stop child-rearing.

This sets up a very black and white dichotomy. You can either have a “outside life” or you can devote your total existence to your children. I would argue that my outside life is probably just as, if not more fulfilling then someone who devotes their life to their “paid work”.

My outside life includes being able to indulge in my hobbies…currently my biggest is photography. One of the things that I love about it is how easy it is to work into our homeschooling lives. I take my camera with me many places (and since we homeschool, we tend to visit pretty neat places that I might not take the time to visit if I was working). Yes, a lot of my pictures are of my kids (my favorite subjects) but many are not.

Another way that I have an “outside life” is through volunteering. When I quit my job when Jason was two, I started volunteering with a great group called The Naomi Project working with at-risk moms. Until I stopped working, I did not have time between working and raising my child. 8 years later, I have cut back on mentoring, but I still volunteer with them, writing a quarterly breastfeeding column for the newsletter and helping with training.

I am also on the Board of Directors of the The Organization of Virginia Homeschoolers. We do all sorts of “adult” things like lobby the state legislature (I have actually become more politically aware and active since becoming a homeschooler), manage a large and active website, produce a quality bi-monthly newsletter, hold an annual homeschool conference (no easy task believe me…we are still looking for folks who want to volunteer!) as well as many additional things too numerous to mention. Since joining VaHomeschoolers I have taught myself HTML and learned a lot about web design, given presentations to hundreds of homeschoolers (I am giving 3 sessions at this year’s conference and recently led a Beginning Homeschool Seminar in Charlottesville), and a host of other “professional development” types of things.

Oh and don’t forget my blogging! I have found that writing is a wonderful outlet for me…one that I enjoy immensely. Blogging has also helped me indulge in learning more about my interests…early american history and child’s lit.

But it’s frustrating to me that it goes without question so often that mothers are obligated to turn those brains and energy over to their children, keeping nothing for themselves, and not even getting that (meager) paycheck at the end of the day that professional teachers receive.

I may have turned my brain and energy over to my children with no paycheck to show for it, but what I have found since leaving my paying job is a passion for what I do. I enjoyed my job, but I LOVE my homeschooling. I get as much out of it as my children do. I not only have a passion for learning with my children, but I have also found that I have a passion for helping new homeschoolers get started. And I am good at it. I love empowering people, helping them get the resources and gain the confidence they need.

Now that I am “home with my children” I have more time to focus on my interests. Yes, it takes a bit of creativity sometimes, but it is doable. I have had more personal growth and learned more about who I am as a person in the last 8 years then I did in the 8 years I worked. What I love is that I am really good at what I am doing now and I do not need nor want a paycheck to tell me that.

Yes, I enjoyed getting the feedback from my employers that I was doing a good job (and the raises were nice as well!). But now I get personal satisfaction and am in control of my own schedule. I have a freedom and a passion that I did not have when I was working. I am doing what is important to me.

And isn’t that what feminism is all about? About being able to do anything that we set our minds to without being told that we can’t? My question is why does that “anything” have to be defined as paid work to be valuable? Why is nurturing our children seen as “less then” or a waste? Isn’t feminism supposed to be about having choices?
Please do not define me or my choices by some pre-determined yardstick. Avoiding arbitrary yardsticks that do not take into consideration the individual is one of the reasons I homeschool!

I know that we are very lucky to have the freedom to make the choice that we have. Jeff owns his own consulting company and is easily able to support us in this lifestyle. For that I am grateful. I have friends that are making much bigger sacrifices to stay home with their kids. If there is the desire, there is a way.

I don’t claim that my choice is right for every woman. I have many friends who work and very much enjoy their careers. I think that is wonderful if it works for them. Staying home with my kids works for me. I don’t see the need for the “mommy wars”. As long as what someone is choosing is working for them, I say more power to them.

And I don’t mean to say that all homeschoolers share my perspective on careers. I may be very unique about not really caring about a career and I do have friends who struggle with these types of questions. I do know that some homeschoolers don’t care about having a paid career. Where as some do want some kind of career in addition to homeschooling. And I have friends who juggle both homeschooling and a career. And that is fine! Because we all have the choice to work on finding the life that is right for us. There is no “right” or “wrong” choice.

But please do not assume that I pine to get paid for my work. Or in any way feel “less than” because I do not have a career. Or that I feel that I am giving up anything or “keeping nothing for myself” by staying home with my children. Or am doing this out of some sort of selfless obligation (believe me, I feel very selfish and sometimes can’t believe that I can get away with this kind of freedom!). This also does not mean that everything is always roses and that I never have any challenges. But challenges are not unique to homeschooling…they are just part of life!

Speaking for myself, I wouldn’t trade my homeschooling life with my children for anything. I love what I do and isn’t that what it is all about?

~Stephanie

Be sure to check out Unschooling Voices #9. Lots of great posts and even some photos. This month’s topic is how unschooling has changed you (the parent, not the child). Lots of newcomers to check out this month too!

Enjoy!

~Stephanie