Throwing Marshmallows

My friend and fellow Life Without School author Tammy has created a new blog called Just Enough and Nothing More to capture her homeschool writings and thoughts. She has a great post up right now called Public School is Not a Smorgasborg:

One of the arguments against alternative forms of education - whether it be homeschooling, private schools, Montessori, or any other - attempts to point out that these alternatives offer a limited view of the world. The arguments claim that by not “allowing” children to go to a traditional school, parents are limiting their experiences.

I haven’t gotten a chance to read all the posts she has up there, but I am looking forward to getting comfy with a cup of tea and reading my heart out.

~Steph

We made it to Chicago! The trip went relatively smoothly and we met up with Jeff’s folks and had a great time with the rest of the Elms’ today. Here is what we have learned on our trip so far:

Air Travel is about waiting in lines: The boys were great, but I think that they were surprised at how much waiting in lines we had to do! A huge line to check in (good thing that Jeff dropped us off while he parked the car!), another line to get through security, another line to get on the plane, another line to check on the rental car and then a final line to get on the bus to get the car!

Computers should be removed from the bag before going through security: This is supposedly a commonly known thing to everyone (including Jeff) except me. I put my bag with the computer through the xray machine, resulting in the need to do a “bag check” which consisted of a security person wiping my computer down and doing a computer analyzation (I am assuming to check for bomb residue?). The boys found it fascinating and it led to a discussion of why they need to do this. What fun.

Airline security is allowed to open and go through my bags at will: I found a note in my suitcase that I was randomly chosen for a search required by their security measures. It was a good thing that I did not lock my suitcase because they are allowed to break in if it is locked.

There are now cell phone waiting parking areas: We saw this both when we left Washington and when we arrived in Chicago. I am guessing that is a place that folks can wait until the passenger they are picking up calls and lets them know that they are here. Beats circling the airport over and over or paying for parking I guess.

Four personal pan pizzas cost $26 at the airport: This does not include drinks!

I am totally spoiled by wireless internet access: I have to plug the computer in here at the hotel to get internet access and I do not have a long cord, so I am stuck in an uncomfortable chair. Of course, maybe if I was more uncomfortable back home, I might not spend as much time online! I am very spoiled and miss blogging while lying in bed or on the couch!

Flying is much easier with a 9 and 6 year old then with a 3 year old and 6 month old: Which was how old the boys were the last time they were on a plane. Just not having to carry them was a great improvement!

I do not need to pack near as much stuff for the airplane as I thought: I packed way too much stuff for the plane and we did not need half of it.

Flying is way more enjoyable when seen through the eyes of a 9 and 6 year old for the first time: The look on the boys faces when they realized that we were flying higher then the clouds was priceless. It is easy to forget how really awesome this realization is!

Wish us luck on the return trip! The reunion was fun…met lots of folks, listened to lots of good stories and the kids met some of their cousins (2nd cousins? Cousins once removed? Not sure, need to go google it…)

~Steph

Things are starting to get a bit busy…we are flying out to Chicago on Friday for the weekend for an Elms Family Reunion. It should be a lot of fun…the boys are really looking forward to the airplane ride. They have not been on a plane since Jason was 3 and Kyle was 6 months, so neither one really remembers it…

And then we are into the final month before the VaHomeschoolers Conference and Resource Fair! I just realized that I have not even mentioned it here on my blog before now…and I am the PR Chair! How could I have forgotten!!

Anyways, if you are going to be anywhere near Richmond, Va on August 25 and 26, you really need to come. Richmond is a great place to spend the weekend! It is going to be so much fun! We are a smaller conference, but one thing that we really do well is provide a varied and interesting line-up of sessions. Truly something for everyone!

Our featured speakers this year are Jeanne Faulconer (an incredible home-grown speaker who is absolutely fabulous), Cindy Gaddis, my good friend over at Apple Stars (who I finally get to meet in person!) and Judith Waite Allee, author of Homeschooling on a Shoestring. I will be giving 2 sessions on Beginning Homeschooling (but don’t worry…the sessions are not all geared towards Va homeschoolers…there is tons there for all homeschoolers). Check out the website for all the details…but hurry! Sessions are filling up fast!

I am going to try to keep up with blogging on a regular basis, but if you don’t hear from me for a few days, you will know why!

~Steph

We have ants. They are all over the place. We tried many different things. We finally resorted to an exterminator. They came out 3 weeks ago, sprayed and said that things should be better in 2 weeks. They were not. I am now waiting for them to come out again sometime this afternoon (of course they can not tell me exactly when, so my kids are at the beach with a friend and I am sitting here waiting for the bug guys to come dump poison in my house…again…in hopes that it works this time).

So killing ants has become almost second nature lately. See an ant on the sink, smush it. See an ant climb up the cutting board, brush it on the counter and then smash it. See an ant in a cup with lemonade, dump the lemonade and be sure to wash the ant down the drain. We have killed many ants in many different ways.

Then this morning. Kyle found an ant in the microwave. He said that he wanted to microwave it. I told him that he could not do that because it was too cruel. He looked at me with totally incredulity and said “But you are just going to kill it…”. So I preceded to explain how killing an ant in a split nanosecond with no warning was totally different then microwaving the poor thing over the course of several seconds. How a quick unexpected death was much more humane then the (relative) slowness of realizing that your molecules are being fried.

Kyle just looked at me as if to remind me that it was an ant that we were talking about and I am sure that he is filing this conversation under “just one more way that Mom has proved that she is nuts” category.

I went over and smashed the ant. And then began to wonder just how long it takes an ant to drown when it gets washed down the drain….

~Steph

We have been having a blast birdwatching down here this year. it is something that I have been meaning to get into more since my MIL gave us Peterson’s Guide to Eastern Birds and my Mom gave us a great set of binoculars (how many years ago was that?). But I never seemed to be able to find them when we needed them.

Luckily down here it is incredibly easy. Our beach house backs onto a canal so we have a wonderful backdrop for seeing all kinds of birds, doing all kinds of things. My favorite time is just after dinner - it seems to be feeding time for the birds as well. It is fascinating to watch as they pick their target and swoop down to grab the fish or even a crab now and then. I even got to see one industrious seagull grab a crab and fly over to a driveway and let the poor crab fall to its death before feasting.

We have a plethora of seagulls of different types which we have yet to identify. And plenty of ducks and geese. But we also have many other more unusual birds as well.

The other day a very large, interesting bird perched himself on one of the pylons on our dock. He was very different from any of the other birds that we had seen. We grabbed the binoculars and bird book, hoping that he would not fly away. We knew that he was not a seagull and I thought that he might be a tern. The boys poured over the book and found a couple that were kinda close, but not quite right.

We continued to turn the pages and low and behold there he was a Black-crowned Night-heron (Nycticorax nycticorax). I had thought that all herons had long graceful necks, and some do, but not this one! We also learned that herons and egrets are in the same family (need to do some more reading on that one to figure out exactly what is the difference!). Our bird seemed to sense that we were curious about him - he sat on the pylon patiently while we spent quite a little while trying to figure out what he was. Then, almost as if he knew that we had figured it out, he flew off.

Now the boys want to figure out what kind of egrets we see flying around - and whether any of them have “golden slippers” like some of the ones in the book.

~Steph

Last week, Jason and I were reviewing punctuation for the California Acheivement Test (also known as the CAT. In Va we are required to provide “proof of progress” which can be done several ways. We use the CAT as a relatively painless way to meet this requirement). We had covered most of what was on the test over the course of the year, but there were a few things that I was not sure that he specifically knew.

One was how to punctuate the abbreviation of a person’s name. So I used Uncle R.J. as an example. How his real name is Randolph James, but we call him R.J. and that there is a period after each initial. Jason turned to me and said (with complete comprehension) “Oh, you mean like M.R. Ducks?”

Yes, dear. Just like the bar here in Ocean City. I am so glad that you could make that connection. Now in the interest of full disclosure, he has never actually been in the bar in Ocean City (although I do believe that they have good food too and we might have to try it out for dinner sometime!). But he did last year see the sign and ask me what Mr. Ducks was. I vaguely remember explaining that because it had the periods in the name that it actually was called M.R. and not Mr.

So once again, we have proof that learning is all about relavent real-life connections. I have no doubt that he will always remember that initials require periods after them thanks to M.R. Ducks.

Oh, and in case you were wondering, he did get it right on the test.

~Steph

Susan did a great job at pulling together the 5th Homeschool Country Fair. Lots of great stuff to read and think about.

I hope to have time to write more soon…I have lots of great beach photos and tons of posts swimming around in my head. What I don’t have is tons of time to actually type them up! At least not if I want to get the sleep that I need to be a patient, warm, loving mom…

~Steph

I have been woefully neglectful of linking to some wonderful posts over at Life Without School lately!

First Marjorie had a great post giving her 2 cents about the latest “Mommy Wars” issue that has been cropping up. She puts an interesting homeschool spin on it all and I was standing up yelling “You go girl!” by the end!

And then our very own Andrea had a wonderful post about putting it all in perspective. A really good reminder that we all could benefit from hearing.

And last but not least, my own post about responding to that age old statement that we, as homeschoolers, hear all the time “I don’t know how you do it”. It is easier then you think…

So check them out…hope that you enjoy!

~Steph

Why is it impossible for me to sleep in in the morning? And I can’t even blame the boys. For some reason I always wake up and stay awake between 8-8:30am. No matter what time I have gone to sleep and no matter how tired I still am.

It is nice since the boys are older, I now have the option, if I need it, to sleep in. WHen they were little I could not wait for this day to come! They are fine getting up and watching a bit of tv before we get going. But try as I might, I am wide awake in the morning and no amount of lying around in bed seems to change that.

Last week I even had the house entirely to myself because the boys were at a sleep over. I was so looking forward to sleeping in…but, nope. Did not happen.

Ah well…let’s just hope that this is a phase and I get over it soon! And I guess that also means that I really should try to get to sleep at a more decent hour. But I  guess that I will have to start on that tomorrow since it is already 12:52am…

~Steph

Another one of my favorite beach pictures. Jason was somewhere around 18 months or 2 years old or so when this picture was taken. Talk about pure enjoyment!

On one of my homeschool email lists we are having a discussion about encouraging musical talents in our kids. Talking about lessons and unschooling piano and encouraging kids to practice. Some moms shared their experiences with being glad to have been encouraged to continue piano lessons with others hating it and wishing that they had been allowed to spend that time on something that they were passionate about.

I think one thing to keep in mind when it comes to music is that not all people are musically oriented or talented, lessons or not…I am not sure if I am really explaining that quite right. I think what I am trying to say is that while I think that everyone can and does enjoy music, not everyone is going to enjoy it in the same way.

I played clarinet from 5th grade through 5 years in college (13 years)…did marching band and symphony bands, took private lessons throughout jr. high and high school. I loved my band experiences and had a blast. However, my clarinet playing was a learned skill, most definitely was not a natural talent…I was ok, but not outstanding and actually had no desire to work or try to become really good. I practiced my half hour a day and enjoyed it, but had no desire to do more then that. In my last year of symphony band in college I asked my director if I could just play the 3rd clarinet part and not have to audition (I hated auditioning!).

Music was not a passion of mine although it was a very important part of my life. To be honest with you, band became more of a social thing…I loved the friends that I had and was a band officer etc (and met my husband there). I do totally enjoy music (especially classical which I think playing in symphony band helped nuture), but I honestly have no true desire to make the music myself. I listen to a wide range of music and especially love instrumentals including symphonies, quartets and the like.

For my brother, music is a gift and something completely natural. He has perfect pitch, can hear and play the bass line of any song by ear (I can barely hear the baseline LOL!). He played violin starting in 3rd grade and also picked up string bass, bass, and tuba along the way. He currently makes his living teaching violin and bass lessons and playing bass in a band. He says that he hears music all the time in his head (which is similar to how I have a running commentary in my head all the time…he is musically oriented, I am word oriented). Music is a part of who he is.

My personal feeling is that if a child is musically oriented then they will be drawn towards things musical. They will seek out those experiences and we as parents need to expose them to a wide range of opportunities. There is no need to push them however or immediately sign them up for lessons. When the time is right, I think that it will be obvious. For some that might happen very young, for others it might happen later. But if it was meant to be, it will happen on its own time (just like everything else!)

Jason actually is very musical, although he has not shown much interest in playing an instrument. He is, however, very aware of music everywhere…he loves movie soundtracks (especially Star Wars) and we have had tons of discussions of how music sets the tone of the scene. He goes into the extras on his video games and plays the different themes over and over and analyzes which ones he likes and dislikes and how they make him feel. We were eating at an Irish Pub on the boardwalk this past week and he absolutely loved the celtic music they had playing…again making comments and analyzing what he liked and did not like.

We were at a friends house and her teenage daughter played a few things on their piano including some tunes that she had made up. My friend commented on how attentive and curious Jason was. As we were walking home, he told me that he thought that he would be able to play piano really well, but he went on right on to say that he did not want to learn yet. He did not really have a reason why but I am ok with waiting for him to be ready.

I see no reason to push this as I feel that if he is really drawn to music, he will get there when he is ready. It will come naturally and will progress on its own schedule. There is no rush, especially since he is very clear that he does not want to “learn” now. (shhh…don’t tell him that he is still learning just by listening and figuring out what he likes and does not like).

So we continue to enjoy music and it is interesting to see what he is drawn to. He definitely likes things with a strong beat, fast paced. He really likes electronic dance music (eek!) that he found on our sirius radio (Channel 33 also known as Area 33). Definitely not my favorite. But luckily much of what he likes I enjoy as well.

And I continue to look for cool music. Currently on the search for Irish/Celtic and what Jason calls “desert music” (middle eastern). One of my favorite sources for neat ethnic music is Putumayo World Music. Really fun music. We have Carribean and Reggae Playground (perfect for the beach) and I have Music from the Coffee Lands. And I look for different ways to expose him to music (we went to a wonderful musical at the Kennedy Center a few months back which is where he discovered that he liked middle eastern music).

I personally think that it will be interesting to watch this interest of his unfold and see where he goes with it. Or doesn’t go with it. Maybe he will have a talent for perfoming music like my brother or maybe he will just enjoy it like me. The great thing is that either way is fine. Because we are each unique and our interests and passions are going to be unique. And homeschooling allows our kids to have the time to discover just what those passions are.

~Steph

I am tired tonight, so I will post yet another favorite beach picture from two (three?) years ago.

And one taken last year.

I just love the beach.

~Steph

I guess that I will ensure my geekdom when I reveal this interest of mine. I love learning about early American History, specifically the time of the American Revolution. Learning about colonial times, the founding fathers, you name it. It is just fascinating!

And of course I should not be surprised to see that there are blogs and websites dedicated to this subject as well.My favorite blog by far is Boston 1775. “History, analysis, and unabashed gossip about the start of the American Revolution in Massachusetts”. Now if I could just find a similar blog for Virginia.

Common-place is really fun website (no RSS feed unfortunately) to get lost in for awhile and is dedicated to early American History. “Common-place is a common place for all sorts of people to read about all sorts of things relating to early American life–from architecture to literature, from politics to parlor manners. And it’s a place to find insightful analysis of early American history as it is discussed not only in scholarly literature but also on the evening news; in museums, big and small; in documentary and dramatic films; and in popular culture.”

There is also this interesting history website, The History News Network, which is actually local to me as it is hosted by George Mason University. You kind of have to hunt and peck to find the articles for the timeframe you are interested and it is very academically oriented but I have still had fun browsing around.

And then there is the Colonial Williamsburg website, complete with podcasts and tons of information. It has been awhile since we have been down there (since before the kids were born) and I keep wanting to make a trip down there. Soon hopefully.

The more and more I poke around, the more I find! And I am running out of space on my sidebar…I keep wanting to add more and more links…but then you have to scroll forever….I wonder if I can get Andrea and Ron to add a left sidebar to this theme…(just kidding…sort of!)

~Steph

Susan over at Imperfect Genius has started a homeschool meme. Looks like fun, so I will play!

1) What country/region/state do you live in?

Virginia

2) How long have you been homeschooling? Just getting started, old pro or somewhere in between?

We’ve been “offically” doing this for 4 years. I have been active on homeschool lists since Jason was around 3.5 yo…so closer to 6 years altogether. Jason went to 2 years of half-day preschool. Kyle has never been to school.

3) Write a little something about your family. Ages? Stages?

Jason is 9, a really fun, cool, very smart kid. He is right-brained/visual-spatial kid and realizing this has made homeschooling oh so much easier. Jason loves video games and good books/stories. He is very bouncy and his mind is always going. He is very thoughtful and loves to see how things work together and relate. He takes things very seriously and thinks a lot.

Kyle is 6, one of those kind of kids that you can just eat up because he is so adorable. He has the sweetest voice and a funny sense of humor. He really looks up to Jason but is starting to come into his own lately. He loves animals and lately is into bird watching. He is a very easy-going, go-with-the flow kind of kid. He is definitely a people-person and gets along with just about everyone. Kyle is more introverted (like his Dad). He tends to be a rule follower and wants to know what he can or can not do…and he has always seemed to have a good sense of balance…he likes video games, but will look for other things to do as well, he eats a variety of things and he goes to sleep easily.

I could not have two more different boys it I had tried.

4) Share some good homeschooling advice you’ve run across.

If something is not working, look for something that does. Do not blame the child…either he is not ready and needs more time or the approach is wrong.

There are no educational emergencies.

5) Tell us something you’re passionate about (besides your family and homeschooling, those are givens!).

I love photography (would love to learn more about composition), blogging, early american history (revolutionary war era) and squishing pennies.

6) If you could take the ultimate field trip, where would you go and why?

I am weird. I have no desire to travel. Honestly. I probably should though.

7) What is a resource you can’t do without?The internet and email. For information and support, it can not be beat. Covers just about everything…support information, research you name it.

How do you homeschool? Classical, Charlotte Mason, Waldorf, Unschooling, Eclectic?

Whatever works for us. Pretty much unschooling, but we are not dogmatic about it.

9) Share a website or two that you visit often - can be your favorite blogger or a curriculum supplier, just any sites you really like.

Well, the obvious is VaHomeschoolers (I am the webadmin!) - the best website for information on homeschooling in Virginia. LibraryThing is my new “toy”.

10) Tell us about one of your favorite projects/activities/trips you’ve had in the past few months.

Well, we are at the beach for the summer and really enjoying it!

11) What is a current/previous homeschooling challenge you’ve faced?

Figuring out how Jason learns because it is so different then my learning style…reading about right-brained/visual-spatial learners has made an incredible difference. I get it now.
12) Share an accomplishment, something about you or your children. Come on, brag about it!

Jason’s reading taking off like it has…folks told me that it would happen, but until you see it, you still worry. I am so happy that I did not push him and let him develop on his own timeframe.

13) What are you looking forward to over the coming year?

The VaHomeschoolers Conference in August…I am the PR chair and it has been a true labor of love. It is going to be so much fun.

14) Name three things you like doing in the summer with your family.

1. Spending time on the beach
2. Eating dinners/relaxing out on the deck
3. Reading out on the dock

15) Have a favorite homeschooling quote? Share it here.

Well, that one is pretty obvious!

“Learning can only happen when a child is interested. If he’s not interested it’s like throwing marshmallows at his head and calling it eating.” - Anonymous

~Steph

Homeschool Country Fair

Susan over at Imperfect Genius is putting out calls for the 5th Homeschool Country Fair. Check out the previous Fairs and if you have a submission let her know!

Deadline: July 18th

Unschooling Voices

And Joanne over at A Day in Our Lives is collecting posts for the 2nd edition of Unschooling Voices. The first edition had lots of interesting posts…let’s continue the tradition!

Deadline: A couple of days before August 1st. (hey, it is an unschooling carnival…who needs concrete deadlines!)

~Steph

This is one of my favorite beach pictures taken 2 summers ago at the water park. It does not get any cuter then this!

~Steph

For various reasons, I did not do much for dinner tonight and as such was asking Jason what he wanted. He (as usual) asked what we had. I started listing things (not too hard, as he is a very picky eater and this limits his choices). When I got to the end of the list, he blankly looked at me and asked me again, what we had.

This happens quite a bit and I can find it frustrating (mild understatement here). Before I could tell him to go look in the pantry and find something himself, he started telling me what had happened and why he did not hear me.

Turns out that when I mentioned grilled cheese, he started thinking about how he was not in the mood for grilled cheese and that it might make him feel sick. This led him to thinking about how one of his neopets gets the measles everytime he eats dairy. Which got him thinking about playing neopets and how he hasn’t in awhile. By that time I was pretty much through my list and he had not heard anything past grilled cheese.

I just had to laugh. He was so sincere…he honestly did not mean to not hear me, but his mind just starts making these connections and goes from there. I did ask him if I was supposed to know what was going on in his mind…he said, no and that it would be scary if I did!

I do love it when I get these glimpses into it though!

~Steph

Oh, we ended up having frozen pizza. Which Kyle then decided that he not want to eat, but so goes my life.

Ok, my fellow authors over at Life Without School keep blowing me away. Missy has an incredible post on The Good, the Bad and the Ugly. It is all about how we don’t read much about the not so good days of homeschooling…the days that nothing gets done and everyone is getting on everyone’s nerves.

“Very recently, a mom posted her late night fears on a local homeschool list. You know those fears, the doubts that creep up on you when you can’t sleep, when your thoughts start crashing together and create new, even more awful thoughts…when you get on the computer and start reading and even more doubts creep in because everyone else seems to have all the answers and is so committed to homeschooling and so confident and so creative and so damn perfect. And, suddenly, you feel about an inch tall and woefully inadequate and your brain explodes with the knowledge that, no matter what you do, you’re going to irreversibly damage your children forever.”

I don’t know about you, but I, of course, have never felt like this. Ha! I really think that we can all relate. And yes, I do think that it is important to remember that no one really knows exactly what they are doing and we are all just kind of winging it as we go. We are all after all human and by no means saints. We have our good days and bad days. We probably just talk about our good days more because they are what gets us through and keeps us going.

I remember reading on an email list sometime that one of the traps that we can fall into (and I think this goes for blogs too) is that we read about this mom doing some really great activities and this other mom who is reading really neat books and yet another mom who has come up with a neat way of presenting math that her kids love and we sort of combine them in our minds into this one “incredible super homeschool mom” who can do everything well and never has a problem. Then we compare ourselves to her and quickly fall short. We have to remember that this “incredible super homeschool mom” does not exist and is a figment of our own imaginations.

So the next time that the homeschool panic sets in (oh, yes, you know what I am talking about, don’t you?) we need to remember to cut ourselves some slack. No one can do everything and be everything to everyone all of the time. Got that?

Luckily the good days totally make up for the not-so-good days and keep us going. And of course, it is all worth it. And I would not trade it for the world. Warts and all.
~Steph

I took this picture last year on the beach and I love it. This was outside The Kite Shop on 5th street…they put out tons of different kites each day. Big kites. Little kites. Traditional kites. Unique kites.

I may have posted this before, but I want to start highlighting some of my favorite pictures of the boys. There is something about the scale of the kite to the boys that I really like.
~Steph

Joanne over at A Day in Our Lives has pulled together the first Unschooling Voices…a collection of unschooling blog posts which will support and inspire you. The question of the month was “How did you and your family come to unschooling?” Looks like lots of great answers to that plus more on other unschooling topics.
So check it out!

~Steph